Growing up, we had formal dinner parties at my grandfather’s home. The tablescape was a cross
between a garden and a museum, and the ladies dressed in long skirts. My step-grandmother
directed everyone to their seats with great authority.
My brother, sister and I found ourselves seated in the kitchen with the maid, Ramey. She was more fun than the grown ups so we didn’t mind. I think my mom secretly wished she was in the kitchen with us.
But that style of formal entertaining is from another era. I’d rather include my kids in the festivities
and help them learn how to behave in situations more formal than a Subway restaurant.
While every parent has a fear of their kids misbehaving in front of company, there are ways to
mitigate that risk. Sure, you’ll still have an occasional meltdown, but isn’t life that way sometimes?
Here are a few practical tips for increase your chances of surviving your next formal holiday party
with kids:
Place Cards
Place cards are a great way to show creativity while subtly creating logical conversational groups. Get the kids involved in making the place cards – they may not look polished, but names written in crayon have heart. Bonus, that’s one less task you’ll need to do.
Tablescape
Keep the tablescape low – it’s hard enough for a grown up to peer over a towering floral
arrangement, but kids don’t stand a chance! If they can’t make faces at each other across the
table, they’re bound to get bored quicker.
Candles are a must, but don’t place precarious flames near the kid’s seats. Use candle holders
with glass to remove the temptation to stick a finger through the flame.
And remember, with any tablescape . . . the friends, family and food take center stage. Keep it simple!
For the Finicky Eaters
There’s one in every family. The kid who won’t eat anything but mac ‘n cheese. My niece was the one in our family, and I’m happy to report that she turned out just fine. You’ll be busy enough without fighting that uphill battle.
Look for snowman or reindeer shaped pasta, and toss it with butter and parmesan. It doesn’t hurt to call parents ahead of time to find out what their kids will and will not eat. But don’t cater to every whim, you’ll go nuts!
Spread the Cheers
If you’re serving wine with dinner, why not serve a sparkling white grape juice for the kids? While you’re at it, let each kid make a toast if they are so inclined – could be interesting, albeit
potentially embarrassing if they bring up things they shouldn’t! Use your best judgment on this one.
Bribery
If you know dinner will be a looooong event, why not steal a page from the McDonald’s play book and give a special gift with the meal…wrap a small item for each kid, then tell them they can only open it if they eat all their dinner and use their best manners. Who among us is above bribery?
Exit Strategy
Be realistic about how long the kids will sit still. Once they’ve finished their dinners, allow them to politely excuse themselves to go in another room and play until the grownups are done. Hint – this is best practiced via role play before the event. If they want extra credit, they can clear their plate to the kitchen on their way out - trust me, your relatives will be so impressed with your parenting skills.
Holidays are a special time with friends and family, and fancy dinners are a natural way to all come
together to celebrate. And just think…you’re creating memories that will stay with your kids forever!
For more practical tips for your home, visit Your home, only better.
